Advent was a foreign concept to me in my early days as a wife. I grew up celebrating Christmas and was taught since birth that Jesus was the true “reason for the season.” But like a good many raised in church, Christmas celebrations involved big cantatas, Christmas parties, candle-lit services, and Christmas hymns sung throughout the month of December. I had never heard of an advent candle or even associated the word “advent” with anything other than a fun daily chocolate box.
Changing My Mind About Advent
It wasn’t until I married Eric that I was introduced to Advent as a season of anticipation and preparation. When he introduced this concept of family worship through in this season, it was actually quite awkward to me! In those early years, I appreciated the sentiment, and I saw the richness, but it didn’t feel natural in any way. It wasn’t until our first child was a toddler that I really started to grasp the concept and truly adopt it as a family rhythm worth fighting for.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the commercialization of Christmas – and much to our detriment. I, myself, have a real tendency to rush to the task list of Christmas before stopping to reevaluate where my heart is in the midst of the season. That is why I knew I needed a simple and attainable Advent rhythm. I didn’t need this rhythm to add to the chaos. I needed it to center me in peace. Advent doesn’t have to be awkward or overwhelming. It doesn’t even have to be daily! The purpose of Advent is to slow us down enough to prepare our hearts with anticipation and joy for the celebration and remembrance of God’s living gift to a dying world: himself.
The Beauty of a Simple Advent Rhythm
While there is certainly nothing wrong with a daily family study, it’s easy for it to become yet another thing to do (or another thing you “failed” to do). In the beginning, I struggled with “doing” advent, rather than “experiencing” advent. In my excitement, I piled advent study on top of advent craft on top of the chaos that is the month of December…and then I felt like a failure when I realized I missed 5 of the last 7 days of my plan. The ornaments hadn’t been colored. The cookies hadn’t been decorated. The calendar hadn’t been flipped. I was so afraid of missing out on advent that I missed out on advent…and unfortunately, Jesus himself!
What if I told you that doing less is actually more?
During the pandemic, we made some pretty big decisions about how our family was going to approach life. Advent was one of them! We scaled back and simplified our approach to a weekly family liturgy over charcuterie. (aka Bible reading and song over goldfish crackers and pepperonis!) That particular year, we felt distant from our people, so we invited a different family to join us each Sunday night of Advent for this sweet time. The candles still flicker brightly when I think back on the simplicity and richness of that year.
Family Worship: Connection Over Perfection
It’s easy to get swept away with the measurable and check-off-able “fun” of charcuterie and party napkins, but don’t forget to budget your efforts wisely. Have a plan for your time together. Pray for your time together as you make preparations. Dim the lights, and lean in close to your people as you draw close to the hope we have in Jesus.
Our Advent Plan
Every Sunday night of advent (the 4 Sundays leading up to Christmas), is set aside for our family advent. Each week, we begin by lighting the candles and singing a line of “We Light Thee Advent Candles” together. After we sing (which was once awkward, but is now our favorite part!), we read the bible verses associated with that week’s theme while the little ones munch away. Afterwards, we engage the kids with simple questions and prayer requests. Before wrapping up our time together, we pray as a family, and the kids take turns blowing out the candles. It’s as simple as that! We have found this rhythm to be intentional and realistic during this time of year. It’s simply creating a space at the table for Immanuel.
If you’ve never practiced advent, don’t lose heart! It may not feel natural in the beginning and everyone may look at you like you’re crazy. But over the years and with the necessary adjustments to meet your family’s needs, this time can become a sweet tradition and a memorable time of connection.
Need Some Help Getting Started?
If you still have no clue where to start or if your approach to advent is needing a reset, check out our Weekly Advent Study! We’re going to be delivering a weekly Advent devotion created for moms. The devotional will be sent to your inbox for anyone subscribed to our newsletter. It acts as a family worship guide, taking selections from the Book of Common Prayer and the Worship Sourcebook. It also has suggestions for how to including the whole family in this simple rhythm of Advent. You can use the form below to get your copy of our devotional ebook. You’ll also receive the weekly email throughout the month of December.
May your Advent be calm and bright!
